WHAT A COWBOY THINKS ABOUT e-BEGGING
This constant bombardment for reviews is invasive
It's completely unnecessary and quite offensive
They want us to think they'll somehow improve
If we'd just give them a positive review
What they're really fishing for is kudos and atta-boys
That they can publish and play with like a bag full of toys
People who are suposed to have a level of expertise
Are asking the layman how to run their companies
They don't want negative reviews by any means
The truth hurts, they say, but not for them it seems
A low rating wlll get a response with excuses
But no changes in the way of improvements
"How did you like your stay with us? Was your meal alright?"
Hell no, I paid for excellence and you want me to accept second rate?
They act like we should be glad we got a bicycle instead of a race car
And if we're not, then somehow, we're the ones who are bizarre
Write to a company about a defective product and wait for a response
A nice customer service agent will sympathize and send you some coupons
For more of the very same defective stuff without actually fixing the trouble
Then they'll beg for a review of their service, sending requests in double
Just try to ignore their request for a review
You'll get threatening reminders in your email queue
Consultants used to get paid huge amounts for this work
Now they're all unemployed thanks to this unverified measurment quirk
Only a fool thinks a wolf in sheep's clothing is acceptable
Their attitude about their obligations to their customers is despicable
They must think we're all blind fools with their lack of quality control
Reviews are their way of dodging their responsibility role
Unqualified reviewers with glowing praise and adulation
Think they'll be more popular and seek their own attention
Then the companies sing their own 5-star song
And say that so many of their customers just can't be wrong
But the one star reviewers and those who say even one is too much
Get ignored or excused as cranks, kooks, nincompoops and such
This global market has given the sellers validation for sub-par
They use this contrived measurement tool to polish their tainted star
When Saint Peter gives them their final review before he opens the gate
Won't they be surprised to find they've woken up way too late
When the trumpets don't blow for them and they're sent below
I'd like to be standing there just to say, "I tried to tell you so!"
© 2025 / Brian McNeal
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THINGS THEY WILL NEVER KNOW
When the "Kodak Moment" happened just as the film ran out
How to make a "long distance call" instead of a shout
Dimming your headlights with the toe of your left foot
Or how to turn real pages in a good book.
Cleaning the chimney and filling the lamp with oil
Waiting longer than a minute for the water to boil.
Making a change for the good without mayhem
Or just making change without a computer to help 'em
What a sock-hop is and a ten cent flick
When "on demand" meant: "do it quick"
How to share music in a listening booth
Or the difference between real and fake truth.
When a cloud stored only rainwater
Why it's good to have an alma mater
What the "rewind" button actually does
And to do what Mama said, just because.
Telling time without a digital clock
Getting excited about going to the cakewalk
What the letters V-C-R actually stand for
Or why it's important to always close the barn door.
When a doctor had the only belt that would beep
How to talk without using text-speak
Holes on the sides of the paper for the tractor feed
Or how to find a job without INDEED.
How to do research without asking Google
The serenity of "Taps" when played on a real bugle
Using all ten fingers on the typewriter keys
Or how much more they can get with the word "please."
What someone means when they need pen and paper
What happens when a plane flies into a skyscraper
Cosmic rays are not something they invented
And coffee is already scented
There is no such thing as artificial intelligence
That politeness and courtesy should take precedence
Just why they should prepare a checklist
Or that real and tangible stupidity does exist
Why people needed carbon paper for their typewriters
That they didn't originate the name "Foo Fighters"
The original meaning of the word "Geek"
Or why it's wise to think before you misspeak
What is meant by the term "Broken Record"
Or why it's necessary to go back to the drawing board
That some things still take a long time to finish
Or why hurrying will cause the quality to diminish
How to write in cursive
Why a song has verses
That a man can never be a female
Or that knowledge requires one to travail
The list goes on and on and will never end
Time changes, and technology will always transcend
The shear amount of what they don't know amazes me
But I don't know why they frown on learning history.
When the "Kodak Moment" happened just as the film ran out
How to make a "long distance call" instead of a shout
Dimming your headlights with the toe of your left foot
Or how to turn real pages in a good book.
Cleaning the chimney and filling the lamp with oil
Waiting longer than a minute for the water to boil.
Making a change for the good without mayhem
Or just making change without a computer to help 'em
What a sock-hop is and a ten cent flick
When "on demand" meant: "do it quick"
How to share music in a listening booth
Or the difference between real and fake truth.
When a cloud stored only rainwater
Why it's good to have an alma mater
What the "rewind" button actually does
And to do what Mama said, just because.
Telling time without a digital clock
Getting excited about going to the cakewalk
What the letters V-C-R actually stand for
Or why it's important to always close the barn door.
When a doctor had the only belt that would beep
How to talk without using text-speak
Holes on the sides of the paper for the tractor feed
Or how to find a job without INDEED.
How to do research without asking Google
The serenity of "Taps" when played on a real bugle
Using all ten fingers on the typewriter keys
Or how much more they can get with the word "please."
What someone means when they need pen and paper
What happens when a plane flies into a skyscraper
Cosmic rays are not something they invented
And coffee is already scented
There is no such thing as artificial intelligence
That politeness and courtesy should take precedence
Just why they should prepare a checklist
Or that real and tangible stupidity does exist
Why people needed carbon paper for their typewriters
That they didn't originate the name "Foo Fighters"
The original meaning of the word "Geek"
Or why it's wise to think before you misspeak
What is meant by the term "Broken Record"
Or why it's necessary to go back to the drawing board
That some things still take a long time to finish
Or why hurrying will cause the quality to diminish
How to write in cursive
Why a song has verses
That a man can never be a female
Or that knowledge requires one to travail
The list goes on and on and will never end
Time changes, and technology will always transcend
The shear amount of what they don't know amazes me
But I don't know why they frown on learning history.
© 2024 Brian McNeal
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A COWBOY'S LOOK AT A SICK SICK WORLD
Disrespect runs amok
It's the "In" thing right now
Vulgar stickers on the truck
The world has gone sour
Graffiti on tombstones
Destruction by design
Protesters foreign born
Can't be in their right mind
It's a sick, sick world for sure,
When everyone's rights trump all
It's a malady without a cure
One man's fun is another man's pall
Lie to get what they want but don't need
Steal rather than pay
That, which outshines all, is their greed
What happened to yesterday?
Honesty is now a fool's flaw
Cheating by hook or crook for fun or smite
Guess they never heard that old saw
Two wrongs don't make a right
The cowboy way has slipped away
No more can we salute that honor
Even the peaceful protest is now cliche
Simple respect in society is a goner
When disrespect is the hallmark
Common decency doesn't have a chance
When did we start living in the dark?
And why don't they pay for the dance?
© 2025 / Brian McNeal
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ZIG ZAG
We never knew just what he'd do in any given situationSometimes he'd drink beer and sometimes he'd have a libationSome days, he'd ride point and some days he preferred the dragWe could never know for sure, so we always called him Zig Zag
He never argued, but he also never agreedHe was about as unpredictable as a filly on loco weedTo do what was unexpected was what he expected to doImagine trying to keep everything copasetic with the crew
We knew, long ago he'd been in the big war in Italy and FranceHe never talked much about it, he'd just get in a tranceOne day, he let it slip that that's where he learned his instinctsBut only after we lubricated him up with several mixed drinks
He said he used cigarette papers for reports, 'cause they were thinAnd if the Nazis ever got too close, he'd just roll 'em up and smoke 'emNo one ever thought much about a person having rolling papersThey were about as common in those days as city neighbors
That's when we discovered that he was no ordinary soldierWith a few more drinks, we got a little more disclosureHe worked for a secret branch of the army under a code nameHe was known as "Bugler" back then, another rolling paper's name
No wonder he'd turn left when we thought he'd go rightNow we know how he dodged capture in the middle of the nightHe was never in that bed on the night they raided the farmInstead, he was counting train cars, far from the harm
Sending the intelligence on Bugler rolling papers by pigeonDodging the enemy and trying to stay out of a Nazi prisonAlways looking over his shoulder and covering his tracksZig Zag was a very fitting name for a feller with a deceptive past
To zig when one should zag is most often an errorDue to limited foresight or inexperience or just lack of due careBut, a calculated zig instead of an expected zag, sometimesJust might mean that you're the one who survives
© 2025 Brian McNeal
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RANTER'S RÉSUMÉ
I've ranted and raved about this and that most all my life
I've ranted and raved about cars and the way people drive
And I've done due diligence about the changing of the time
I've ranted in color, in the press, incognito and in rhyme
Most all my life, I've ranted and raved about conditions that
Rile and rankle and rub raw the nerves under my hat
And I've got to say it's done me no good most of the time
But I feel a lot better once I've gotten the subject off my mind
Oh, give me a rant, a real good rant, and I'll sure tell you
Give me a topic from the tropic with oceans blue
Give me a reason, any season, Summer, Spring or Fall
I'll give you direction, without objection, rants for one and all
I've ranted and raved about this and that most all my life
I've ranted and raved about cars and the way people drive
And I've done due diligence about the changing of the time
I've ranted in color, in the press, incognito and in rhyme
Most all my life, I've ranted and raved about conditions that
Rile and rankle and rub raw the nerves under my hat
And I've got to say it's done me no good most of the time
But I feel a lot better once I've gotten the subject off my mind
Oh, give me a rant, a real good rant, and I'll sure tell you
Give me a topic from the tropic with oceans blue
Give me a reason, any season, Summer, Spring or Fall
I'll give you direction, without objection, rants for one and all
© 2026 Brian McNeal
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IN SEARCH OF TRUTH
The more we know we knowThe less truth we findAlways the other kindThat comes and then goes
At the end life here on earthWill we have knowledge of it?Will we benefit from its efforts?Or will we simply start a new birth?
Will we finally know the truth?After death will it be revealed?Or will it always be concealed?Oh, the innocence of youth
Do we carry our sins?Or leave them behind?Do we start a new grind?When we lose, do we finally win?
© 2026 Brian McNeal
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LIFE IS LIKE ...
Life is like a string mop
Dirt from bottom to top
Needs to be cleaned
Before benefits redeemed
Life is like a box of chocolates
Always digging into our wallets
You never know what's inside
Or even what's implied
Life is like pages in a book
The next is worth a look
Always turn the page
Before your moorage
Life is like a board game
Until the storm came
No "Go" No "Boardwalk"
Plenty of political backtalk
Life is like a cup of tea
Sipped ever so slowly
Too fast, and you're burned
A lesson to be learned
Life is like a race car
Goes too fast and too far
A gift on your birth day
But you can't afford it anyway
© 2026 Brian McNeal
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WORDS ARE FREE
If words were a dollar,
Would people use more?
Minimalism in language,
What are the words for?
No one needs to buy a vowel,
Or a word or a phrase.
They all come free anytime
I know, it's an old-world craze
But it's served us well
For many years and then some
Language arts are important
To help us with comprehension
Would you be so stingy,
If words were a buck?
Would you use less,
Or take more for luck?
When all the words you ever want,
Come free of consideration or cost.
Why skimp and cut corners?
Communication cannot be lost.
Use 'em or lose 'em.
You know how it goes.
Alphabet letters and symbols.
Then you'll be right on the nose.
If words were a dollar,
And you could have all you desire,
How many would you use?
How many would you acquire?
© 2026 Brian McNeal
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